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the blackest black
photography by  luke hayes

photography by luke hayes

there's been a lot of chatter with the winter olympics starting tomorrow. 

in the midst of all of that, i stumbled upon this pavilion designed by asif khan using that chemical substance that absorbs almost all (99.965%) of radiation of the visual spectrum.


it's a visual black hole and completely disrupts three dimensional space. though, it adds elements of it back with the assorted star-lights outside.

“from a distance the structure has the appearance of a window looking into the depths of outer space. as you approach it, this impression grows to fill your entire field of view. so on entering the building, it feels as though you are being absorbed into a cloud of blackness."

twenty seventeen

according to some weird website, these were my top nine photographs on instagram this year – (ironically) selected by which ones received the most likes. they're far from my best photos that i've taken this year, or the ones that mean the most to me, at least. 


it's been a long year. i'm done with my lists of things that have happened in the spans of time between each time i write. i think. gosh, it's been a long year. 

i feel like the end of 2017 and the beginning of 2018 is the firsts of lasts (or maybe even the lasts of firsts), if that makes sense. i told my mom in november that this is my last thanksgiving living at home. i told her the other day that this is my last christmas living at home. i'm living my last december, january, and february of high school. i already had my last birthday at home. the walls in my room are slowly filling up with the last photos of my time in new york. i'm going to have my first last prom. and my first last graduation. 

it's weird. 

in this lull of time – of waiting time – until the end of the year, i feel like i'm just wasting time. wasting time all the time. i'm doing things, like school work, but even that seems empty in a way. i think anticipation is killing me. 

i started volunteering at an animal shelter. i started drawing again (the last time, if you remember, was in 8th grade). i might sign up for an art class a few times during the week. i'm trying to start a notebook (but, so far unsuccessfully) again. i'm listening to new music. that doesn't feel empty. even though i'm filling empty time with old things. 

i'm not getting nostalgic yet. 

it's snowing outside.

that's nostalgia. 

here are my hand-selected songs that i listened to the most in 2017. izzy of 2018, listen to these if you want a glimpse back in time. 

a color study: orange

axel oswith | othello grey | dan rubin | faithcouch | mike lyon | ferrian reynaldi | motokimokito | lukasph | yumna

i have been in a creative rut recently. i'm trying to get back into photography again after my 2 month-long hiatus in the fall. (remember that documentary i'd been working on?). i've been curating images a lot. i've done a curation in the past of parallel images of people and weird things on the street

but let's start new. 

here's orange. 

on another note, i haven't talked about what's going on in my life lately. it's almost december. thanksgiving is over. fall is (close to) being over. i'm in the midst of senior life and nearing the end of my teenagedom. what???

i just finished my senior yearbook page. 

i just submitted my college applications.

i just turned eighteen. 

i just made a movie. 

i just presented in front of a board of trustees.

i just got my driver's license. heck, i can drive.

i just booked my own flight. 

i just started dancing.

i'm doing all these new things. i feel good. 

dear izzy of 2018, you did good in 2017.